Star Trek

Every time I come home my family and I catch up on the latest sci-fi. Anything with the word "star" in it we've probably already seen, and we've probably got it on dvd. Star trek, Star Wars, The Last Starfighter...

Star Trek is probably our most favorite.

Here's how things go. Dad pops the popcorn. Alicia, Ben, and I snuggle into the couches. Someone calls the Tobe- otherwise known as our schnauzer Toby. And mom sings the beginning credits to the episode.

My house is filled with quartz crystals and petrified wood. We play monopoly. We dig through magazines for bizarre ads and post the prized ones on the fridge. This year nobody likes my music and tells me I am becoming a hippie. "Pomegranates?" my dad says, "You're eating what now?" Also, this year I discovered that I live in a family of giants. I stood in the middle of the kitchen during Thanksgiving and found that I was smaller than everyone there. I was constantly looking up while speaking to people. My grandma was the first to notice, "I told you Caitlin! You're the runt."

I've learned invaluable life lessons through my family. Lessons like: singing songs about one another is acceptable in the house but not acceptable in public, fighting over how much the dog loves you proves that you are the most loved, and that only your siblings are going to fully appreciate how hard you worked to beat that last boss. As a unit we create a safe place for each other, allowing each member to be as strange and offbeat as they care to be. I don't think I'd be me without this crazy Holman clan.

"Beam me up Scotty."

Acorns

A few days ago I woke up and was filled with a sense of rebellion. It was completely irrational. I felt like I was in junior high. I ended up having an argument with God on the way to class.

You know those days where you wake up and something goes just a little bit wrong? Your alarm clock was just a little bit too loud, or Pandora just happened to decide to hate you and played all of your least favorite songs while you got ready for class. That’s how it felt.  And that small seed of angst seeped through my logic and ended up making me angry for no reason.

I ended up wearing the most unruly outfit I could find in my closet. Skinny jeans, converse, Where the Wild Things Are too big for me t-shirt, blue flannel jacket, mustard yellow frumpy hat. It was crazy, it made no sense. I even told God I was sorry in advance.

So I texted Michelle- “Feeling really rebellious and angsty today. Please pray for me. PLEASE”

Got out of class and started walking down the sidewalk. Out of nowhere there was a wave of leaves. Reader, you don’t even understand. I was covered. They were in the shoulder of my shirt, my hair, my hands. Then my unexpected, unrealistic emotion began to soften. I looked up at the tree and said to God, “Wait. You still love me?”

And that’s when I was pelted by acorns.

Acorns that responded: “Duh I love you. But don’t do that again.”

The Usual

Here are some thoughts I had while in a coffeeshop.

• "I should blog about this."
• "My pen is too fat."
• "I wish I could stay in a coffee shop forever."
• "I love the sound of people; The idea that I can be identified with a group of people while sitting by myself and studying. Like two soul associations."
• "My chai always tastes better towards the bottom."
• "I've never seen a boy be so enthusiastic with his gestures. He's throwing his hands in the air."
• "I'm not wearing shoes."
• "Is that socially appropriate?"
• "I'm sitting on a couch."
• "Did I just hear that young freshman couple say they were setting Shakespeare to 90's songs?"
• "I hate writing on the back of notebook paper."

Wednesday

So, tonight I was talking to God in my car on the way back home from Tabu. We were talking about how I take my life entirely too seriously. I started saying, "God, will you just show me that it's okay to relax and have fun? Please show me that it's good to laugh."

At that exact moment a car full of teenagers pulled up next to me. "Oh gosh..." I thought and looked forward. The boy sitting in the front seat honked his horn. I turned. He waved at me, blew me a kiss, and drove away.

At first I was offended.
Then I thought about the conversation I was just having.
And laughed all the way home.

I love mornings.

Especially rainy mornings like today. It makes me feel like I'm in some British movie reading Benjamin Bunny and eating a scone. But in reality, I woke up in a house with wooden floors and ate breakfast across the table from a plastic Christmas angel named Gloria.